I still remember the first time I decided to tithe. I was in college, making just over minimum wage, paying for school myself, and—no surprise here—living with a negative net worth.
At the time, the idea of giving 10% sounded like something people with real jobs did. I was just trying to buy gas and an occasional McDouble off the dollar menu. But I gave anyway—about ten dollars from a hundred-dollar paycheck.
That first gift didn’t make sense on paper. But it did something inside me that stuck. It was like a reset button for how I viewed money. For the first time, I wasn’t trying to squeeze every dollar to make it work for me. I was letting go of it on purpose.
And that changed everything.
What I found was that giving hasn’t gotten any easier as my paychecks have grown. If anything, it’s harder. The dollar amounts got bigger, and so did the excuses. But every time I have chosen to give, I have felt a mix of discomfort and relief. It was uncomfortable because it required trust—but peaceful because it reminded me who was really in charge.
Fast forward a couple decades, and I’ve found myself deep in another kind of giving experience: helping lead the capital campaign for our parish. It’s been a crash course in generosity, logistics, and humility (and yes, spreadsheets).
You learn quickly that money is rarely just about money. It’s tied up with purpose, gratitude, and the quiet question of what kind of story we’re writing with our lives. That’s probably why conversations about money can feel so personal. It’s never just math—it’s emotion, identity, and experience all tangled together
A View from the Other Side of the Table
In my day job as a financial planner, I talk with people about saving, investing, and preparing for retirement. But lately, my conversations have shifted toward something even more personal—how people give.
A lot of those conversations start the same way. Someone says, “I’d love to give, but I’m not sure how to do it in a smart way.”
And that’s a good question, because giving isn’t just about pulling out your checkbook. There are plenty of creative ways to give that can align with your financial goals, lower your tax bill, and still make a meaningful impact.
Serving on this campaign has been a reminder that generosity doesn’t fit one mold. Some people give quietly every month. Others donate appreciated stock. Some use their IRAs. Some give their time. Every one of those is meaningful.
And while everyone’s situation is different, the pattern is the same: giving brings perspective. It helps people move from “Do I have enough?” to “I’ve been given enough to share.”
The First Step In Giving Is Gratitude
I know that sounds cliché, but it’s true. Gratitude is the fuel for generosity.
When we take time to recognize how we’ve been blessed—financially, relationally, spiritually—it’s hard not to want to pay it forward somehow. Gratitude takes the edge off worry. It reminds us that the goal isn’t to stockpile resources; it’s to use them well.
And that shift in mindset is good for more than just the soul. It’s also good planning. When you see money as a tool rather than a trophy, your financial decisions start to fall into place.
Practical (and Smart) Ways to Give
Here’s where we can get a little more tactical. During the campaign, I’ve had a lot of conversations with families trying to figure out how to give in a way that fits their situation.
Below are some of the main approaches that come up in my work and through our parish campaign.
1. Cash, Pledges, and Online Giving
The simplest option is still one of the best. Many people prefer to pledge an amount and spread it over a few years, making the commitment fit naturally into their budget. Most churches and charities can handle ACH transfers or online gifts, which makes giving consistent and easy.
2. IRA Qualified Charitable Distributions (QCDs)
If you’re 70½ or older, you can make a charitable gift directly from your IRA. The amount counts toward your Required Minimum Distribution (RMD) but doesn’t show up as taxable income. It’s one of the cleanest, most efficient ways to give for retirees—especially if you don’t need your full RMD.
3. Appreciated Securities
Donating stocks, bonds, or mutual funds that have gone up in value can help you avoid capital gains tax and still get a charitable deduction for the full fair market value. For investors who like efficiency, this is a win-win.
4. Donor-Advised Funds (DAFs)
A DAF is like a charitable investment account. You make a contribution, take the deduction right away, and then direct gifts to your favorite charities over time. It’s a great way to simplify giving if you support multiple causes or want to give strategically over several years, but want the deduction all at once.
5. Real Estate or Property
Some people find that gifting part or all of appreciated property—such as farmland, rental homes, or mineral rights—can be an effective way to give. These gifts take coordination but can have a huge impact.
6. Gifts of Grain or Livestock
For farmers and ranchers, donating commodities before they’re sold can lower taxable income while keeping production expenses deductible. It can be a smart fit for farm families and something we see this fairly often in our area.
7. Matching Gifts
Many employers (and even some retirees’ former employers) offer matching programs that double or triple your charitable contributions. It’s one of those opportunities that’s easy to overlook but incredibly valuable.
8. Legacy Gifts
For those thinking long term, naming a charity or parish in your will, trust, or life insurance policy is a simple way to leave a lasting impact. Even a small percentage allocation can go a long way.
Each of these strategies has its own nuances, and not every one will fit your situation. But they all serve the same purpose: turning good intentions into meaningful action.
Giving in Real Life
One of the best parts of this campaign has been seeing generosity in action—quietly, humbly, and without fanfare.
I’ve met farmers who give grain, young families who stretch their budgets to make room for a small monthly gift, and widows who give in memory of loved ones. Each of those gifts tells a story.
And I’ve noticed something universal: nobody regrets giving. They might wrestle with the decision beforehand, but afterward, there’s a peace that comes with knowing they contributed to something lasting.
From my vantage point—both as a financial planner and as someone sitting in the pews every Sunday—that’s the real return on generosity. It’s not about recognition or even tax benefits. It’s about alignment. When your giving reflects your values, everything else in your plan starts to feel more coherent.
The Planner in Me Still Loves the Strategy
Let’s be honest: I can’t help myself. Even when I’m talking about generosity, my brain still likes to think in terms of structure and efficiency.
Good stewardship isn’t just about good intentions; it’s about good planning. You can give joyfully and intelligently. A little strategy often makes your generosity go farther—sometimes dramatically farther.
That’s why I encourage people to think of charitable giving as part of their overall financial plan, not something separate from it. The same way you plan for taxes, retirement income, and investments, you can plan for giving. Doing so creates clarity. You’re not reacting; you’re choosing.
Giving Shapes You (And Me)
Giving isn’t just about supporting good causes. It’s a practice that changes the person doing it.
I’ve come to believe generosity works a lot like forgiveness, or discipline, or even physical training. You don’t wait until you feel like doing it. You choose it, again and again, because you know it’s good for you — and over time, it reshapes you.
Sometimes giving comes easily. Other times, it’s uncomfortable. There are moments when you’d rather hang on tightly or tell yourself you’ll start “once things settle down.” But when you give anyway — when you make it an active choice — something happens in your heart. You loosen your grip. You reorder your priorities. You get a little more grounded in what actually matters.
That renewal isn’t a one-time burst of inspiration. It’s gradual, like building strength in the gym or learning to forgive someone who’s hurt you. Each repetition softens you a bit. Each act of generosity trains your heart to trust that there will always be enough.
It’s not about the size of the gift or the public recognition. It’s about the quiet, steady work of forming a heart that’s free.
Making it Meaningful
Money is a powerful tool. It can build security, opportunity, and freedom. But it can also build connection.
Giving connects you—to people, to purpose, and to perspective. It keeps you grounded in gratitude and reminds you that financial success means more when it’s shared.
If you’re looking for a way to make your giving more intentional, start small. Pick something that matters to you—your church, your local school, a cause that aligns with your values—and find one way to give this year that stretches you just a bit.
And if you’re already giving, take a moment to appreciate what that habit has done for your life. Generosity has a way of quietly recalibrating what “enough” means.
As for me, I’m still learning—through my work, through this campaign, and through that same tug-of-war between comfort and calling that started with a ten-dollar tithe all those years ago. But I’m convinced of one thing:
The return on giving isn’t measured in percentages or performance charts. It’s measured in peace, purpose, and the kind of satisfaction that spreadsheets can’t capture.
If you’d like to talk through ways to give more intentionally—whether through your church, your favorite cause, or your retirement plan—I’m always happy to help. Not because I have all the answers, but because these are the conversations that remind me I’m part of something bigger than myself.
This post is for education and entertainment purposes only. Nothing should be construed as investment, tax, or legal advice.